Kim Possible Porn Story: Detour Chapter 1

Detour

By Charlotte C.

The tiny rental car crept along I-40, chugging up into the Appalachian Mountains. The air coming in the windows was slightly coolera refreshing change from the heavy humidity of the valley, but the breeze barely ruffled Shegos hair.

Arent you taking this law-abiding thing a little too far? Shego asked.

What do you mean? Drakken was driving, and had been enjoying the scenery and singing along to an oldies station on the radio.

You could at least approach the speed limit, she replied, pointing to a 55 MPH sign beside the road.

Ive got the gas pedal all the way to the floor, Shego, he snapped.

You mean it wont go any faster? she asked in disbelief. She hadnt driven many four-cylinder economy models in her lifeactually, she couldnt remember ever having driven any sort of economy model.

No, it wont go any faster, Drakken mimicked. Do you think I enjoy having everything from tractor trailers to station wagons blow me off the road?

Shego scowled and cut her eyes toward him. Tell me again why were doin this, she said.

Because the hover car is out of fuel, and apparently theres some sort of rule or ordinance or something against civilians purchasing plutonium, and since my government contract requires that I not break any laws, especially international ones –

No, not that. I mean, why are we going to your old college of all places?

Because they invited me this time, Drakken answered. Did you know that Chen and Ramesh, my old college roommates, are faculty members? Their research at the Mt. Middleton Observatory is funded by the university, and occasionally they teach a few seminars. And James Possible is on the Board of Directors. Apparently, this whole thing was his idea.

But you hate those people. Why do you need their approval? Why not just say to hell with them and move on? She asked.

Its not about approval. Its about vindication, he said, hands tightening on the cars tiny steering wheel.

That again? she asked.

Yes, that again, he groused. Since the invasion, Ive actually gotten somerespect. And its beenpleasant. He explained.

Yeah, okay, I get that. And I get that youre actually enjoying working for the DOD doing research on weaponizing the plant formula and working for the Department of Agriculture on using it to increase food production andhey, I cant knock an employer that can spend a billion dollars without a second thought, even if being your legitimate lab assistant is about as exciting as watching paint drybut a professorship at your old college? I dont get it, She insisted.

But dont you see? This is the final victory Shego! Theyll finally have to admit that I really am a genius. My formula saved the world. None of them invented a super-plant-potion that could destroy advanced alien technology. Ive finally shown them! And I want to see their faces, he insisted, stomping on the accelerator as one of those new electric cars passed them. The rental car crept up the mountain slowly, the engine whining in protest as Drakken fumed. Whats going to pass us next? A moped?

Pull over. Let me try. Shego ordered.

With pleasure, Drakken replied, slamming on the brakes, pulling off onto the shoulder in a cloud of dust and switching seats with Shego.

On the road again, she picked up the previous conversation. Whatre you supposed to teach, anyway? Supervillainy 101? Intro to Death Rays?

He glared at her. For your information, they want me to work in their biotechnology department. He dug through his bag in the backseat, producing a college catalog with a flourish. Here. See – Id be teaching classes on lab techniques, scientific method, cell culture, recombinant DNA, bioethics-

Bioethics? She asked, eyebrows raised.

Yes, bioethics. According to the catalog, topics will include the relationship between science, technology, and society, the effects of new biotechnology products on the natural world, risk assessment

Oh, that Ive got to hear, she said.

He scowled. I didnt say I was going to take the job.

Shego shifted into second gear as they started climbing a steeper incline. The car lurched and sped up infinitesimally, the whine of the engine turning to a louder groan as she punched the gas pedal to the floor.

Shego sat on a bench outside a convenience store somewhere in Tennessee.

Drakken stomped into the store, wearing a grim expression. A few feet away, the little yellow rental car sat forlornly in the parking lot, hood up, nasty grayish-white water boiling out of the radiator, acrid smoke billowing out around it.

Shego glared at it. She hated yellow cars.

A few minutes later, Drakken came out of the store, looking even grimmer, but carrying two sodas and some junk food.

Well, itll be at least two hours until the tow truck can get here, and the rental company cant get us another car until at least noon tomorrow, he groused, flopping onto the bench beside Shego. I got you a soda, he added.

She blinked, staring at the diet cola he was holding out to her. He had gotten her a soda. The kind she liked. Without being asked. That wasthoughtful. He had been doing things like that lately, since the invasion. Since that awkward hugging thing, which they had both explicitly ignored afterwards. Neither of them had said anything about it, but she had noticed that he seemed to be more aware of her than before

Well, do you want it or not? He asked, waving it in front of her face.

She took it, twisted off the cap and took a long swig, gazing at the cars coming and going at the row of gas pumps across the parking lot.

She heard Drakken open his snack.

Twinklies? She asked, wrinkling her nose. You do realize there are absolutely no natural ingredients in those, dont you?

What are you, my mother? He asked. He wasnt in the best of moodshed hoped to at least make it across the Mississippi today, and instead they were barely into Tennessee, and stuck. At this rate he would miss his interviewand more importantly, his opportunity to gloat.

Im just sayin, she shrugged, taking another drink of soda. Not like this stuff is exactly healthy either, she admitted.

They sat there in annoyed silence.

Shego finished her soda; Drakken finished his Twinklies. They threw the trash into a nearby garbage can. People came and went, in and out of the store, buying snacks and paying for gas and paying them no attention.

They waited.

Drakken shifted on the bench. The wooden slats were pressing into his back and cutting off the circulation to his legs.

Shego looked at her watch. They had only been waiting for fifteen minutes and already she was bored out of her mind. And hot. Even though her jumpsuit was made of a special fabric that insulated in cold weather and ventilated in hot, she was starting to sweat in the August heat.

Do you really wanna just sit here and wait for that tow truck? Shego asked.

Do you have a better idea? Drakken replied.

WellJust how dead-set are you on this not breaking the law thing? She asked.

He looked thoughtful. It wasnt that hed suddenly decided to repent. He really had no moral compunction against breaking the law, but right now he had success, fameand a lucrative government contract.

Well, Im enjoying thiswell, not this he waved his hand, indicating their current predicament I meanfame, money, people being nice to me

Shego felt relieved. She had been a bit concerned about this new-found desire to follow the letter of the law.

So, you just dont want to get caught doing anything illegal? She asked, to clarify.

Well, yes, I suppose thats accurate, he said.

She smirked, looking at the cars at the gas pumps. In that case, I think I know a way outta here, she answered. Get our luggage.

They walked slowly, close together, behind the row of pumps. Shego leaned her head toward Drakken.

Not that one. Not that one. She whispered. He could feel her breath in his ear. It occurred to him that he liked it.

Definitely not that one. Some cars she eliminated immediately as not fast enough, not new enough, or just plain not cool enough. Others were eliminated because they had passengers inside. She certainly didnt want to drive off with three or four screaming kids in the backseat.

Drakken watched her. She was thorough, calculating, competent, and practically crackling with energy. Hed always enjoyed watching her work, like some people enjoyed watching a professional athlete or dancer perform.

That one, she said, barely inclining her head toward a large black SUV with a shiny chrome grill and an easily recognizable hood ornament. A young man, barely more than a boy, leaned against the side pumping gallon after gallon of gasoline into the tank.

He looked to be in his late teens, with stringy dishwater blonde hair under a backwards baseball cap. He was wearing jeans that were so baggy it was a wonder they didnt fall off, an oversized net tank top, and several gold chains.

Probably fake, Shego thought.

He was listening to the stereo in the vehicle, bobbing in time to the beat, oblivious to the danger of filling up with the ignition partly on. The music was so loud they could hear the lyrics, which obviously came with a parental advisory.

Wannabe, Shego sneered, pulling Drakken past the car.

The boy finished filling up. He replaced the gas cap, snapped the cover shut, and looked at the total on the pump. Eighty-four dollars. He shook his head, disgusted, replaced the nozzle on the pump, turned back toward the SUV.and stared in stunned dismay as his fathers not-yet-paid-for sixty-thousand-dollar vehicle sped away, bouncing out of the parking lot and into traffic.

Twenty minutes later, when the police arrived, he couldnt remember which way the car had turned out of the parking lot, or his dads license plate number.

One hourand ninety five mileslater, Shego pulled into a Cow and Chow, parking beside another black SUV just like the one she was driving.

What do you want? Drakken asked, opening the door.

Just a grilled chicken sandwich no mayo – and ice water, she said, climbing out of the drivers seat and stretching. Hey, you got a screwdriver?

As a matter of fact, yes, Drakken replied, reaching into the inner pocket of his lab coat and pulling one out. Will this do?

Perfect. She smiled, glanced around, and walked behind the two identical vehicles.

An hour later, police cars surrounded a large black SUV in a suburban mall parking lot. Guns drawn, they ordered the driver to come out, hands up.

A very confused, frightened-looking little old lady climbed stiffly out of the drivers seat of her own car.

It took fifteen minutes before someone checked the VIN and realized that the license plate on the little old ladys car was stolen, but the vehicle itself was not.

Parked on the east side of the bridge over the Mississippi, just past Memphis, Shego and Drakken watched the sun set over the wide river.

Shego leaned against the seats leather headrest, tired but pleased with herself.

The late summer sun blazed orange, then red, then turned a brilliant crimson as it slipped slowly below the horizon, turning the river red and gold and then, suddenly, black. The fierce heat of the day subsided, giving way to the warm moist air of evening. Long purple shadows stretched across the sky, and liquid darkness seeped in around them.

For a split second, Shego was fifteen again, and parked by a lake on the outskirts of Go City, out past curfew, stupid emergency pager Hego had given her turned off, car radio playing some nauseating song… (How am I suppooooosed to live withouuuut youDont blast the radio; dont blast the radio), waiting for Kurt Henderson to find the courage to do more than kiss her. Bra unhooked, armpits clammy under her soft green sweater

Dammit, why am I thinking about that now? She shook her head to clear away the memory, and turned the key in the ignition.

We should ditch this car, she said, shifting into gear. They drove across the Mississippi River Bridge, turning to the right after crossing, onto a road named, appropriately but not very creatively, River Road. It didnt take long to find a deserted boat ramp.

Drakken got out, taking their bags with him. Shego lowered the windows and rolled the oversized vehicle onto the boat ramp slowly. She could hear the gravel crunching under the tires. She opened her door, and jumped clear of the vehicle as it rolled into the muddy brown water of the Mississippi, the tires making a slurping sound in the muck.

Drakken cocked his head to the side, puzzled. Wouldnt it have been better to be going really fast? He asked.

Shego, walking across the gravel to join him (he couldnt see her in the dark, only hear her), said. Nope. Thats what people think, but a car moving slowly will drift out further before it sinks. Makes it a lot harder to find. She was beside him now; he could smell her hair (grapefruit and cinnamon) and feel the warmth radiating from her skin.

Ah, he said, resisting a sudden urge to put his arm on her shoulder.

A serviceable motel not far up the road provided two rooms for the night. The next morning, they called a cab, which took them to the nearest airport. A short flight later, and they were in Middleton, on the way to the Middleton Institute of Science and Technology.

They were waiting in the lobby of the main building. Shego shuffled through the magazines on the table and frowned. Ugh. All scientific journals, she scoffed, tossing them back onto the table in disgust.

She watched as Drakken, looking flustered and agitated, paced around the room. Several chunks of spiky hair had sprung up on top of his head, despite his obvious efforts to slick them down with gel.

Stupid hair, he grumbled. He scratched his neck and pulled at his collar and complained about having to wear a tie. He tugged at his lab coat, adjusted his belt, looked at his reflection in the window and gave a half-hearted growl.

He shook his head, frowning. I needsomething. He said, unable to figure out what it was.

Shego looked him over from head to toe, giving him a critical, appraising starehis hair was too slicked down, almost helmet-like, but otherwise she thought he looked fine. However, he was fidgeting like a third-grader on picture day.

Maybe I shouldve worn cufflinks. He said. Or a vest? Or a different tie?

Shego narrowed her eyes. No, it wasnt the clothes. What he lacked right now was confidence.

She stood up, the cool appraising expression replaced by a strange half-smile. You do need something, she said.

He stopped pacing. There was something behind that smile that was frightening and exhilarating at the same time.

He gulped, and looked at her. He could feel all the repressed and ignored thoughts he had refused to let himself think surfacing. He knew if he let them out, there would be no cramming them back inlike when someone opened a closet door in a sitcom and clutter just sprang out.

Shego stepped closer to him. He could feel her breath on his cheek. She reached out, straightened his tie, and brushed a string off his shoulder. I never wanted to be a lab assistant, she said.

He blinked a few times, confused at the abrupt new topic.

Never wanted to be a schoolteacher, either. I majored in child development because it was the only thing Hego would pay forteaching was a good, stable, safe career. Safe, she sneered. But I liked history, and art. I thought it wouldnt be so bad teaching art. Kinda cool, ya know? She was smoothing his hair down with her fingers, tucking a strand behind his earthat tickledtwirling his ponytail.

Idont understand he began. Art? Shego liked art? Drawing and painting? And why was she telling him this now? Was she quitting?

Of course, I discovered my true talents theft, infiltration, abduction, combat later. She continued, as she rumpled the hair she had just smoothed. Much better, she said, smiling.

Behind Drakken, a door opened. Shego, looking over his shoulder, could see a group of people stepping through it. She recognized a few of themKimmies daddy she knew, of course, and the other two, Chen and Rameshshe had seen pictures of them.

So, ya see, Im not still with you because of the job, she said.

And she kissed him, soft and warm and for a very long time, standing in the lobby of the Middleton Institute of Science and Technology, while the interview committee gawked at them.

The End

A/N

So, I didnt ask anyone to beta-read this I wrote most of it in the past couple days, and wanted to publish it before I left to go out of town so, sorry for any errors. I tried to proofread carefully, but its always more difficult to catch your own mistakes. I actually wrote the part where their car breaks down and they steal the SUV a long time ago, but it wasnt a story, just a slice of life thing with no real point. Finally came up with a reason for it and finished the story this week. This is totally unrelated to any of my other stories. I wanted to write a different sort of story, one where they dont get together right away after Graduation, and one where they at least try to be good.

Having the hover car use plutonium as fuelobviously my own invention. There needed to be some reason they were driving a cheap rental car, so And yes, I liked Back to the Future -saw it when it first came out.

And, yeah, having Chen, Ramesh and Dr. Possible being affiliated with the Middleton Institute of Science and Technology is just poetic license, but I dont think its too far-fetched. In Attack of the Killer Bebes, Chen and Ramesh worked in an observatory. Observatories are mostly funded either by the government or by universities. And they were referred to as Professor Chen and Professor Ramesh. While Dr. is the common honorary title for anyone with a Ph. D., Professor implies that one is employed by a college or university and at least teaches a class occasionally. And James Possible, being a respected and prestigious alumnus, could easily be on the Board of Directors.

The course names and descriptions of the biotechnology classes are real classes (that I would most likely fail if I tried to take them) offered at the college where I work.

You downshift when youre driving up a mountain, for anyone who didnt know that. But a cheap, poorly maintained rental-car-type four-cylinder just isnt going to hit fifty-five on a steep incline, no matter what.

DOD: Department of Defense

VIN: Vehicle Identification Number the real ID number for a car, usually found on a small piece of metal in the lower drivers side corner of the dash, under the windshield.